Cowboy Envy (Romani Detective Original Fiction)

[asphaltcowgrrl]

Title: Cowboy Envy
Fandom: Romani Detective Original Fiction
Pairing: Andrej Zeklos/Zayne Reyes
Rating: PG-13
Word Count: 2,738
Summary: Zayne thinks Andrej’s being hit on by a co-worker and won’t let it go.
Author’s Notes: Written for the weekend challenge at 1_million_words. I kind of lost the thread of the prompt there for a bit, but it came together in a way I hadn’t expected in the end. My prompt was: The lead character sees a cute carpenter in a new light.

“Where’s the body,” Zayne asked the uniform guarding the entrance to the crime scene.

“Over that way,” he said, pointing. “The ME and her assistant are down there. Can’t miss ‘em.”

“Thanks,” Zayne said, ducking under the crime scene tape, holding it while Andrej did the same. He nudged his partner and pointed. “I see Dr. Mulholland.”

As if hearing her name, Carla looked up and spotted them. Andrej smiled and waved at her. She was an intelligent woman with a wicked sense of humor, widely liked by everyone she encountered. As a bonus, she was extremely patient and didn’t let Zayne get under her skin. Not like the previous medical examiner had. He had not liked Zayne one bit.

“It’s about time, gentlemen,” Dr. Mulholland joked as they approached where the body lay. “What took you so long or do I not want to know?”

Tamping down on the blush he felt rising to his cheeks, Andrej shook his head. “We were at a department function tonight. Even when you have a call, it is sometimes difficult to get away from the what are the called?”

“Bigwigs,” Zayne supplied.

“Yes, that,” Andrej said, nodding.

“I guess that would explain why Reyes is dressed nicer I’ve ever seen,” Carla remarked. “You two remember my assistant, Corbin Faulkner?”

“We do,” Andrej said, nodding at the young blond sitting by the corpse’s feet.

“We do,” Zayne asked, squinting at the kid. “Can’t say that I’ve ever seen him before.”

“Zayne, do not be rude.”

“I’m not, I’m just saying –“

“Do not mind him,” Andrej said to Corbin, interrupting Zayne’s incoming tirade. “He means no harm. He just has a faulty memory.”

Shrugging, Corbin waved Andrej’s apology off. “Este bine,” he said with a laugh.

“What did you just say,” Zayne asked, tearing his eyes off the assistant and shooting a look at Andrej before glaring at the kid again. “I can’t have two of you muttering about shit I don’t understand. One is enough.”

“He said it was fine that you were being impolite,” Andrej translated, giving the young man an approving look. “De ce?”

“Why what,” Zayne asked, still confused.

Carla Mulholland snorted. “You must walk around muttering that a lot if Reyes picked it up.”

“You have no idea” Andrej chuckled. “Why are you learning my language, Corbin?”

“I’m hoping to take a trip to Bucharest next year,” he said. “It’s something my brother and I have wanted to do for years. Visit some of the big cities in the part of Europe no one thinks to visit? Prague, Budapest, Bucharest, those kinds of places.” Corbin looked sheepish for a moment. “It’s also why I was so excited to meet you. Figured you might be a good source of information.”

“You can quiz him later,” Carla scolded. “We have a body, remember?”

“Sorry,” Corbin said. Looking at Andrej, he apologized again. “Later?”

“Of course,” Andrej said, squatting down beside the medical examiner. “Carla knows how to get in touch with me. Feel free to call or come by the station any time you have a question.”

“Thanks,” Corbin said. “I appreciate it.”


“What do you think, Zayne,” Andrej asked as they left the crime scene. The victim had likely been strangled and dumped in the park. Who or why remained a mystery.

“I think that Carla’s assistant was trying to impress you,” Zayne muttered.

“He was not,” Andrej said, trying not to roll his eyes. “He was only trying to better himself. And I was referring to our victim, Zayne.”

“Uh-huh,” Zayne said. “Right. Which is why he was trying to talk to you in your native language.”

Andrej looked at Zayne and frowned. “What is wrong with you? We have a case to solve and you are grumbling about the assistant ME?”

“Never mind,” Zayne snapped. “You can’t see it, you never see it.”

“What are you talking about,” Andrej asked. He stopped walking and turned to face Zayne.

“You denied the fact that Rosewood was interested in you. Same for that guy at the bookstore. Anytime someone flirts with you, you miss it. Sometimes, I wonder how the hell you became a detective.”

Zeklos pressed his lips together, gathering his thoughts. “I did not realize Jay was interested in me because I was too busy trying to fight my feelings for you, Zayne. And for the rest, however many you might think there are, I have two handsome, wonderful men that love me. Why would I ever look for something somewhere else?” He paused and then brought his hands up, palms facing the sky. “Other than in situations like this where you cannot get past the fact that a handsome, single man might have an interest similar to mine?”

“That’s not fair,” Zayne grumbled. He crossed his arms over his chest and frowned.

“But it is true, is it not?” Andrej didn’t wait for an answer. “Corbin is a smart kid, Carla has told me so many times. I wonder what his interest is in Eastern Europe?”

“You are,” Zayne said dryly. “Come on, let’s get out of here before we start to fight,” he added quickly before striding off towards the parking lot.

Andrej looked at Zayne walking away and resisted the urge to flip him off. “If we start to fight,” he muttered in French, if only because he could, “it will be because you are instigating it. Again.”


“So, I hear you have a new admirer,” Trish said, rolling her chair over until she was shoulder to shoulder with Andrej at his desk.

“Zayne is making things up,” he said, eyes never leaving the report he was reading. “He believes everyone is trying to seduce me away from him.”

“So, Dr. Mulholland’s assistant doesn’t have any interest in you,” Hilary asked. “He seems like a nice kid.”

“He is,” Andrej confirmed. “Corbin and his brother are planning a trip to Bucharest,” he said, pronouncing it the way Romanians did. “That is where his interest begins and ends.”

“And what about yours,” Trish asked. “If you listen to Reyes – and that damn narco – you’d think you were about to leave them both for the assistant medical examiner.”

That gave Andrej pause. Looking up, he glanced from Trish to Hilary. “They are not saying that are they?”

“Not saying it exactly,” Hilary began. “But from the sound of the jealousy in Zayne’s voice, I think he believes it.”

Andrej sighed. “How did I get mixed up with the two most insecure men I have ever met?” He shook his head. “Corbin is good at his job. He is smart and funny and –”

“And attractive,” Trish said.

“Yeah boy he is,” Hilary added. “Just don’t tell Jake I said that, okay? He’s nearly as bad as Zayne when it comes to that shit.”

“And,” Andrej said, ignoring their interruption, “is interested in my homeland. If any of you ever expressed any real interest, I’d have happily answered any questions you might have had. May I go back to work now?”

“Sure,” Trish said with a snort. “But I don’t think you’re going to get a chance to because you have company.”

“Detective Zeklos,” Corbin Faulkner said as he approached the group of homicide detectives, “can you spare a few minutes?”

Andrej looked up at the approaching young man and smiled. “Of course. What can I do for you?”

Corbin looked sheepishly at the girls who weren’t even pretending not to be listening. “I’ve been collecting information on Romania for a few years now since it’s the country I’m most interested in. My brother’s fond of Poland and Hungary, so those are the places he’s been researching.” He ran his fingers through his hair and forced a smile to his face. “Anyway, I was wondering about places to visit and things to eat. You know, touristy stuff that you can’t miss.”

Andrej made a face. Food was easy, he knew what he liked and what to suggest. He’d been living here long enough to know what traditional foods would and would not appeal to an American’s palate. Having force fed Zayne various Romanian treats over the years had helped.

But the places to see was always a hard question for him since he’d grown up poor and unable to visit much of anything. However, he had learned a lot about his country’s history and attractions while he’d been living in France, so he wasn’t completely out of the loop. He’d actually bought a guidebook many years ago that he’d marked up with things he wanted to see if he ever made it back home again.

“I have a book at home that would be of great help to you,” he finally said. “I have outlined things that I would like to visit should I ever make another trip. It is old, but so is most of my country so I do not think that its age should matter much. I will bring it tomorrow and you can come get it anytime.”

“That’s awesome, thank you so much. And the food?”

He shrugged. “I can tell you what is popular and what you are likely to find in most restaurants, but really it depends on what you like and don’t like to eat.”

“Stay away from that polenta crap,” Zayne muttered as he slid into his chair.

Proud of the fact that Zayne didn’t snap at Corbin, Andrej smiled. “Let him decide for himself what he likes. After all, you never thought you’d like sarmale either.”

“Cabbage rolls,” Corbin said, brightening. “I know what those are.”

“They’re an acquired taste,” Zayne chuckled. “But good. And speaking of food, are we ready to bolt or what? My stomach’s rumbling.”

“When isn’t it,” Hilary shot back with a laugh.

Glancing at his watch, Andrej nodded. “We can go now if you would like,” he said, closing the file he’d been perusing. “Is there anything else I can help you with before I go, Corbin?”

He shook his head. “Not right now, but I’ll email you if I think of anything else.”

“Please do,” Andrej said. Once Corbin was out of earshot, he said Zayne’s name.

“Yeah?”

“Thank you for being nice,” Andrej said. He shouldn’t have to praise Zayne for being a normal human being, but sometimes a little positive reinforcement went a long way.

“Eh, the narco and I decided that the kid was harmless,” Zayne said, rolling his chair back and standing. “The ginger is waiting for us, too.”

“Well damn,” Trish said. “You’d better get going before those two get the hungry mungries and eat you out of house and home.”

Laughing, Andrej told the girls goodnight and followed Zayne out of the office.


While Zayne was getting the mail, Andrej retreated to the bedroom. Staring at the bookcase he had in a corner, he scoured the shelves until he found what he was looking for. It was an old, dated copy of a tourist’s guide to Romania, worn and battered, but still in one piece. He grabbed it off the shelf and carried it out into the living room and set it down where he usually stashed his keys.

“Nothing but a bunch of junk today, Zek,” Zayne called out as he dropped Andrej’s keys in the basket where he usually kept them.

“Let me have it,” he said, holding out a hand for what Zayne had brought inside. “I will put it in the recycling.”

“Sure,” Zayne said, handing it over. “What’s for dinner? Rosewood called to say he’d be here in thirty.”

“I do not know yet, but give me a few minutes and I will have a couple options for you. Hopefully Jay will not mind whatever you choose.”

“No problem, take your time,” he said. He reached into his pocket and pulled out his wallet. As he moved to set it in the basket with Zeklos’ keys, he noticed the book. Zayne dropped his wallet into the basket and picked up the book. “What’s this,” he asked, carrying it into the kitchen.

Andrej looked up from the mail he was systematically tearing into quarters. “It is an old guidebook on Romania that I had. Although it is old, it will make for a good starting place for Corbin.”

“Hmm,” Zayne said, flipping through the pages. “You need a guidebook for your own country?”

Stuffing the last of the mail into the recycling bin, he scratched at his chin. “I did not see much of my country while I lived there,” he said. “I had no money to travel and not enough education to know what my country contained that was of interest.”

Zayne gave him a sad look. “That’s awful,” he said. “I’ve not been to a lot of the US, but at least I know where I want to visit and why. Is that why you bought this?” He shook the book he was still holding.

“Mostly, yes,” Andrej said. “I thought that if I ever got to go back for fun that I would visit every place in that book that I could.”

“Yeah, I can’t imagine your father’s funeral gave you much desire to explore.”

He shrugged. “I saw a few things in Bucharest while I was there, but nothing as exciting as the monasteries or castles that are in the book.”

“We’ll get back there one of these days,” Zayne said. “I want to meet your family if nothing else. Shit, you’ve met most of mine and yet you still like me.”

Andrej laughed. “I love you, there is a difference.” He opened a cupboard and took stock of what he had. “I do not have a lot of meat in the refrigerator, however I can make us something easy like fried rice or a stir-fry.”

“Pasta maybe,” Zayne asked, eyes catching on something in the book. “No meat necessary as long as you make that vodka sauce that’s so damn good.”

“I can do that,” Andrej laughed, pulling out a can of crushed tomatoes and a box of penne from the cupboard.

“Hey, Zek,” Zayne asked as Andrej was turning away from him. “What does this say?”

Putting everything he was carrying onto the counter, Andrej looked at his writing in the book and read it out loud to Zayne.

“I meant, ‘what does this say in English’ you asshole,” Zayne teased.

“Oh,” Andrej said, surprised by the fact that hadn’t occurred to him. “It says, ‘Zayne would love to see an amusement park underground in an old salt mine’.” He looked up at Zayne and smiled. “Or there is a steam train you can ride that I think you might also enjoy.”

“Okay, now we really have to save our pennies and go the hell to Romania,” Zayne said, grinning like a child. “An underground amusement park? But man, that steam train ride sounds like fun, too. Very old west, isn’t it?”

“It is,” Andrej said, returning to the ingredients that would hopefully become dinner soon. “Which is why I mentioned it. Now, I must get started or we will never eat tonight.”

“Can I look at this for a bit,” Zayne asked. “I promise not to sabotage it or anything. But that’s got my interest now.”

“Go ahead,” Andrej said. “Just make sure you put it back so I don’t forget to take it to Corbin tomorrow.”

“What if he doesn’t bring it back,” Zayne asked, lowering the book so he could look at Andrej.

“I will buy a new one,” Andrej said, matter-of-factly. “Then you and Jay can go through it and figure out what to see when we finally get to go.”

“That sounds like an amazing idea,” Zayne said, planting a loud, wet kiss on Andrej’s cheek. “And yanno, I might have to thank that little shit for this. Even if he is hitting on you, Zek.”

Sighing, Andrej ignored the jab at the assistant medical examiner. One of these days, Zayne would realize he didn’t always have to defend his spot by Andrej’s side. Today was obviously not going to be that day but, well, he hadn’t expected it to be either. “Dinner in half an hour, Zayne.”

“I’m counting the minutes,” he said as he carried the book out into the living room.

Because of course he was, his belly ruled all some days. With a laugh, Andrej grabbed the can opener and went to work on dinner.