I've had the people pleasing disease most of my life. One of several things I'm actively working on. Working out? Something like that.
You have no obligation to answer any text ever! Not immediately, not five hours later- it's all entirely up to you. That's a concept I'm also grasping to fully understand - that virtually everything is a choice and we can choose something else.
For me, I have my phone set to send calls straight to VM and not to alert me to texts from 10pm-7am - not so much because of sleep but because I'm freaked out by even the idea of getting bad news late at night. It's only been an issue a couple of times - my sis calling to ask a question t 10:15pm and not getting me. But it matters to me not to be reachable in those hours, so I maintain that boundary.
Boundaries are hard. That's the other thing I'm learning. Well, they're not hard to set- they're work to maintain, especially when you've been raised with the mindset that it's your responsibility not to disappoint anyone ever. :}
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Date: 2019-04-10 04:22 pm (UTC)You have no obligation to answer any text ever! Not immediately, not five hours later- it's all entirely up to you. That's a concept I'm also grasping to fully understand - that virtually everything is a choice and we can choose something else.
For me, I have my phone set to send calls straight to VM and not to alert me to texts from 10pm-7am - not so much because of sleep but because I'm freaked out by even the idea of getting bad news late at night. It's only been an issue a couple of times - my sis calling to ask a question t 10:15pm and not getting me. But it matters to me not to be reachable in those hours, so I maintain that boundary.
Boundaries are hard. That's the other thing I'm learning. Well, they're not hard to set- they're work to maintain, especially when you've been raised with the mindset that it's your responsibility not to disappoint anyone ever. :}