February 7
Feb. 7th, 2023 09:38 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
asphaltcowgrrlToday's prompt: write about a bad situation that has turned good in your life.
So, you might know where this is going. And I'm sorry for being predictible? LOL
Anyway, the whole situation with Troy's kidney disease taught me a lot about well, a lot. I learned more and more about proper nutrition, what foods are high in phosphorus, which are high in potassium, and how to maneuver my way around an extremely restrictive diet to make healthy, tasty meals that weren't going to land him in the hospital.
I learned how much he relied on me and how much he appreciated that I did it all without any complaint (mostly lol). And after I lost him, I discovered that I could suck it up and do it all, because I literally had no choice.
There's also my in-laws. People I've known since I was 15, people who have always been good to me, even better to my children. I got lucky, I never had any of the horror stories a lot of people seem to have with their in-laws, but I never felt close to them, even if I knew they cared. That has definitely changed. They're more expressive with me and as always, willing to help no matter what's gone south.
My girls and I have always had a good relationship, and they've always been close with one another. But since losing their father, the three of us have definitely gotten closer. Mostly due to realizing that nothing is ever for certain. Hate that they had to learn that so young, but nothing I can do about that.
Lastly (god, I know, about time), over the last three years, I've learned how to be a person on my own. I started dating Troy in high school, at 15. We moved in together at 20 and got married at 23. I'd never honestly been without him and learning how to be alone has been a chore. I have no local friends and so I've been spending a lot of time with myself. Taylor is talking about moving out this summer when her friends move back from Reno, so that will be the real test of how well I can sit with myself. Maddie will still be at home, but she'll be working, going to school, staying with her friends at times, so I won't see her nearly as much as I do Taylor right now (who isn't working due to her courseload).
(Okay, I'm laughing at Spotify now. Of all the songs to choose at this moment lol.)
So, you might know where this is going. And I'm sorry for being predictible? LOL
Anyway, the whole situation with Troy's kidney disease taught me a lot about well, a lot. I learned more and more about proper nutrition, what foods are high in phosphorus, which are high in potassium, and how to maneuver my way around an extremely restrictive diet to make healthy, tasty meals that weren't going to land him in the hospital.
I learned how much he relied on me and how much he appreciated that I did it all without any complaint (mostly lol). And after I lost him, I discovered that I could suck it up and do it all, because I literally had no choice.
There's also my in-laws. People I've known since I was 15, people who have always been good to me, even better to my children. I got lucky, I never had any of the horror stories a lot of people seem to have with their in-laws, but I never felt close to them, even if I knew they cared. That has definitely changed. They're more expressive with me and as always, willing to help no matter what's gone south.
My girls and I have always had a good relationship, and they've always been close with one another. But since losing their father, the three of us have definitely gotten closer. Mostly due to realizing that nothing is ever for certain. Hate that they had to learn that so young, but nothing I can do about that.
Lastly (god, I know, about time), over the last three years, I've learned how to be a person on my own. I started dating Troy in high school, at 15. We moved in together at 20 and got married at 23. I'd never honestly been without him and learning how to be alone has been a chore. I have no local friends and so I've been spending a lot of time with myself. Taylor is talking about moving out this summer when her friends move back from Reno, so that will be the real test of how well I can sit with myself. Maddie will still be at home, but she'll be working, going to school, staying with her friends at times, so I won't see her nearly as much as I do Taylor right now (who isn't working due to her courseload).
(Okay, I'm laughing at Spotify now. Of all the songs to choose at this moment lol.)
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no subject
Date: 2023-02-07 09:01 pm (UTC)You made me cry, again.
But I am so very proud of you!! SO VERY!
no subject
Date: 2023-02-07 09:42 pm (UTC)I'm sorry! I did warn this time though!
Thank you! Sometimes I can't believe it's been three years or that we've all come out of this in one piece.
no subject
Date: 2023-02-08 12:53 am (UTC)*hugs*
no subject
Date: 2023-02-08 09:19 pm (UTC)Thank you, this means a lot. Helping others is in my nature, but I also recognize that I've been giving so much help unconditionally over the years, that the least I can do is pay it forward. 💚
no subject
Date: 2023-02-08 01:43 am (UTC)This is so very well said, and -wow- really highlights how much change you've had to work through in the last half a decade or more.
I'm glad your in-laws are so supportive, and your kids are closer to you as they hit the ages they are at. It is not always an easy phase for moms and daughters. Good for you all!
no subject
Date: 2023-02-08 09:15 pm (UTC)Thank you! And I know, there were so many small adjustments as well as big ones.
Me, too. My sister never really got along with her ex-husband's mother and it made things tougher on an already difficult marriage (they got married young). So true. Taylor and I butt heads a LOT because she often thinks she has a say in the way I handle things in the house. Like child, start paying rent and we can talk. 🤣
no subject
Date: 2023-02-08 03:02 am (UTC)The recent story you shared about your in-laws really showed how much they are there for you guys and that is wonderful.
no subject
Date: 2023-02-08 08:51 pm (UTC)Thank you for reading. :) Me, too. They're pretty much the only thing that kept me going during the hardest parts.
Yeah, they really are wonderful people and we're very lucky to have them.
no subject
Date: 2023-02-08 03:35 am (UTC)This is such a great thing to read. I know it's been hard on all of you, but you are amazing, and it's so great you can see all this good at this point. Love you! ❤️
no subject
Date: 2023-02-08 08:53 pm (UTC)Thank you. :) Some days, it's still really hard, but we're definitely making progress. Love you, too, my friend! 🧡